My brother has a wife and daughter (with a baby on the way!) in Australia. I have never met my niece (she turned 2 in January), but I hope to soon. Since we live so far apart, I’m not close with my sister in law. When she mentioned creating birth announcements for us, I jumped at the chance. She was just starting our her custom papers and stationery company and wanted a good start.
Here it is:
Can you read the inscription?
And up close view, with the texture of the paper easily seen.
I love them!
She even created a matching envelope!
Seriously, LOVE
Usually we send out Christmas cards, but it was too short of notice to have pictures taken and made into cards in time, so this was our “this is why we didn’t send out Christmas cards” excuse.
My sister in law has an Etsy site called Paper Ivy, she has wonderful designs! Go visit!
When Piper was 6 weeks old I went back to work. When Piper was 4 weeks old, I was bored out of my mind at home, counting down until I could go back. Piper is 5 months old now, and I hate working.
Perhaps it’s a combination of the stress I feel while at work- the need to literally be in two places at once- and the lack of GOOD time I get with her, but I’m starting to really stress out. All weekend I sit there stressing about having to go to work on Monday. On Mondays I count down until the weekend. It’s a cycle that has gotten us from Piper’s 6th week to her 5th month.
Lately though, it’s been intolerable.
I HATE that I have to choose whether or not to enter the bills or invoice customers or play with Piper and her rattles. She deserves better than that. I WANT better than that for her. She’s not sitting alone and neglected, I’m always within a foot of her (unless the boss takes her for a stroll) , and we’re constantly talking, but how I long for the freedom to lay her down for a nap in her own bed.
This morning it hit me so hard, the differences between a working-with-baby mom, a SAHM (stay at home) and a working-sans-child mom. While I DO have a small amount of freedom – like breastfeeding at work, and having her with me all day, and the ability to head out to take a walk if she gets fussy- the fact remains that from 8-4 I am an employee, and not to the baby.
Working moms have problems, I know. The ones who leave their children with family, daycare or with a nanny have to leave their children every day. I can imagine how heartbreaking this is. They miss out on the majority of their baby’s day, sometimes not even making it home early enough to say goodnight. The very notion of that is saddening. Then again, their child will at least be slightly independent, and able to be around a variety of people (sans mommy) without freaking out. Double sided coin, that is, since the parent would feel they aren’t needed. When they go to work, they are there for one thing- WORK. They do their job, and go home. They aren’t distracted by poopy diapers, or needing to feed their child. Some moms WANT to work, they need a persona outside of their “mommy” role. I totally understand that. Some mommies HAVE to work: either being the sole breadwinner, or living in a high cost of living area thus needing double incomes, or being the one with the insurance (OH so valuable with a baby), that there is just no other answer.
SAHMs (with only one child) have it seemingly easy (to me, I’ll explain why in a second). They get to spend good quality time with their child, nurturing and educating, bonding and sometimes napping together. They don’t need to worry about the stresses of time management as much as working moms, nor do they need to feel guilty about getting a little “me” time when not waith the baby- because they get so much of it! Some may worry about money, though. They may get bored, or wistful thinking of how it USED to be, working and all. Their partner may never be home because they have to work longer hours to support the family- and in result the SAHM may feel some guilt over that. They may miss adult time, and look for friends with the same schedules, since their working friends can hardly take time off to go to the park… then there’s that- they can go to the park. They can go to zoos, museums and malls. They can go visit Daddy at work (or at play) and spend time with retired family. This is what I want. Freedom.
I consider myself a good mom- I do what needs to be done for Piper. She’s clean, fed, and dressed, and is never ever neglected. She sleeps well, and plays all the time. Piper is one of the happiest babies I have ever known- she even wakes up happy. I just wish… we had more time.
I wish we didn’t need both incomes, I wish I could stay at home… This morning, Piper was super grumpy, because I had to wake her up at 6:30 to go to work (I HATE THIS, by the way), and I wanted to give her a bit of a walk to get sleepy. We went into Starbucks to get my usual (Toffee Nut Hot Chocolate), and as I waited I gently rocked her stroller. A woman slightly younger than my parents looked at me and said, “They’re wonderful, aren’t they?” I agreed, and together we peered into Piper’s stroller. Piper smiled back at us around her fingers, and slowly closed her eyes. I received my drink and we headed out for a brief walk around the block. It was 7:45am, the sun was shining, there was a cool breeze, my beautiful daughter was sleeping in her stroller. “This is how it should be”, I thought.
Instead of taking a leisurely stroll with my daughter on a lovely morning, I was rushing to get back to the office to take the call forwarding off. I had to rush over cracks in the sidewalk, jostling Piper, all so I could make it back in time. It was then I realized how much I resent having to work.
I know I’m lucky to have a job that allows me to bring Piper in with me, a lot of working moms would love it, but it does have its challenges. It’s so hard to keep a balance between working and playing. My boss vaguely references how often Piper is on her back (or front, with the rolling over), and makes me feel like a shitty mom. I want to yell at him: “What do you want me to do?? I can’t hold her and bill at the same time! I can’t do the banking and nurse my baby! I can’t DO IT ALL!” I do what I have to do to- go to work every day, and spend plenty of time with her when I can, but it’s getting really hard.
