Ambergontrail – Trying to get through life without dying of dysentery

My brother has a wife and daughter (with a baby on the way!) in Australia. I have never met my niece (she turned 2 in January), but I hope to soon. Since we live so far apart, I’m not close with my sister in law. When she mentioned creating birth announcements for us,  I jumped at the chance. She was just starting our her custom papers and stationery company and wanted a good start.

Here it is:

Can you read the inscription?

And up close view, with the texture of the paper easily seen.

I love them!

She even created a matching envelope!

Seriously, LOVE

Usually we send out Christmas cards, but it was too short of notice to have pictures taken and made into cards in time, so this was our “this is why we didn’t send out Christmas cards” excuse.

My sister in law has an Etsy site called Paper Ivy, she has wonderful designs! Go visit!

When Piper was 6 weeks old I went back to work. When Piper was 4 weeks old, I was bored out of my mind at home, counting down until I could go back. Piper is 5 months old now, and I hate working.

Perhaps it’s a combination of the stress I feel while at work- the need to literally be in two places at once- and the lack of GOOD time I get with her, but I’m starting to really stress out. All weekend I sit there stressing about having to go to work on Monday. On Mondays I count down until the weekend. It’s a cycle that has gotten us from Piper’s 6th week to her 5th month.

Lately though, it’s been intolerable.

I HATE that I have to choose whether or not to enter the bills or invoice customers or play with Piper and her rattles. She deserves better than that. I WANT better than that for her. She’s not sitting alone and neglected, I’m always within a foot of her (unless the boss takes her for a stroll) , and we’re constantly talking, but how I long for the freedom to lay her down for a nap in her own bed.

This morning it hit me so hard, the differences between a working-with-baby mom,  a SAHM (stay at home) and a working-sans-child mom. While I DO have a small amount of freedom – like breastfeeding at work, and having her with me all day, and the ability to head out to take a walk if she gets fussy- the fact remains that from 8-4 I am an employee, and not to the baby.

Working moms have problems, I know. The ones who leave their children with family, daycare or with a nanny have to leave their children every day. I can imagine how heartbreaking this is. They miss out on the majority of their baby’s day, sometimes not even making it home early enough to say goodnight. The very notion of that is saddening. Then again, their child will at least be slightly independent, and able to be around a variety of people (sans mommy) without freaking out.  Double sided coin, that is, since the parent would feel they aren’t needed.  When they go to work, they are there for one thing- WORK. They do their job, and go home. They aren’t distracted by poopy diapers, or needing to feed their child. Some moms WANT to work, they need a persona outside of their “mommy” role. I totally understand that. Some mommies HAVE to work: either being the sole breadwinner, or living in a high cost of living area thus needing double incomes, or being the one with the insurance (OH so valuable with a baby), that there is just no other answer.

SAHMs (with only one child) have it seemingly easy (to me, I’ll explain why in a second). They get to spend good quality time with their child, nurturing and educating, bonding and sometimes napping together. They don’t need to worry about the stresses of time management as much as working moms, nor do they need to feel guilty about getting a little “me” time when not waith the baby- because they get so much of it! Some may worry about money, though. They may get bored, or wistful thinking of how it USED to be, working and all. Their partner may never be home because they have to work longer hours to support the family- and in result the SAHM may feel some guilt over that. They may miss adult time, and look for friends with the same schedules, since their working friends can hardly take time off to go to the park… then there’s that- they can go to the park. They can go to zoos, museums and malls. They can go visit Daddy at work (or at play) and spend time with retired family. This is what I want. Freedom.

I consider myself a good mom- I do what needs to be done for Piper. She’s clean, fed, and dressed, and is never ever neglected. She sleeps well, and plays all the time. Piper is one of the happiest babies I have ever known- she even wakes up happy.  I just wish… we had more time.

I wish we didn’t need both incomes, I wish I could stay at home… This morning, Piper was super grumpy, because I had to wake her up at 6:30 to go to work (I HATE THIS, by the way), and I wanted to give her a bit of a walk to get sleepy. We went into Starbucks to get my usual (Toffee Nut Hot Chocolate), and as I waited I gently rocked her stroller. A woman slightly younger than my parents looked at me and said, “They’re wonderful, aren’t they?” I agreed, and together we peered into Piper’s stroller. Piper smiled back at us around her fingers, and slowly closed her eyes. I received my drink and we headed out for a brief walk around the block. It was 7:45am, the sun was shining, there was a cool breeze, my beautiful daughter was sleeping in her stroller. “This is how it should be”, I thought.

Instead of taking a leisurely stroll with my daughter on a lovely morning, I was rushing to get back to the office to take the call forwarding off. I had to rush over cracks in the sidewalk, jostling Piper, all so I could make it back in time. It was then I realized how much I resent having to work.

I know I’m lucky to have a job that allows me to bring Piper in with me, a lot of working moms would love it, but it does have its challenges. It’s so hard to keep a balance between working and playing. My boss vaguely references how often Piper is on her back (or front, with the rolling over), and makes me feel like a shitty mom. I want to yell at him: “What do you want me to do?? I can’t hold her and bill at the same time! I can’t do the banking and nurse my baby! I can’t DO IT ALL!” I do what I have to do to- go to work every day, and spend plenty of time with her when I can, but it’s getting really hard.

Paul has given me the task of finding my Mother’s Day gift. I know, unoriginal, right? Paul is usually the best gift giver of the two of us, so it’s not like he’s foisted this on me for lack of inspiration.

No, Paul wants me to have something I’ve wanted since Piper was born: a Mommy necklace! I think I’m going to link him to a few ones I like, and let him choose.

I love this one, because of the owl!

"Whoo do you love"

This one here strikes me with the tree- a start of our own family tree.

"Our Family Tree"

This necklace is super personal, and touching- unfortunately also based in the UK.

Baby Fingerprints!

I ADORE the brass/sterling mix on this pendant.

Brass and Sterling

This one here is smaller than the owl, but equally cute.

"Captured Heart"

What I’m looking for is a necklace that isn’t too large, too heavy or plain. I want to put Piper’s name and birthday, and possibly Paul’s name. Mostly I want Piper’s name and birthday, than anything else.

Which do you like? Do you have any ideas for other necklaces?

Every year I go to the Renaissance Faire with my mom, cousins and Aunt. We drive out the Saturday morning, go straight to the faire, then head to the hotel afterward. Yes,  we stay the night. So, Piper and I went. Our very first night away from Paul (which wasn’t too bad, as he was gone most of the weekend for track meets) was going to be trying, especially since I was sharing a room with my high school Freshman cousin.

The actual faire itself wasn’t too bad, the weather was warm, but there was a breeze. Unlike some of the parents there, Piper was covered while in the bjorn or in her stroller nice and shaded, so there was little to no sun exposure. Of course, because I decided to be a responsible parent and put a HAT on my daughter while she was Bjorning it, some jackass goth rejects were saying she was like baby R2D2, because she couldn’t see out. Excuse me, Black Parade, but my DAUGHTER is not a STAR WARS item, shouldn’t you be moping in the basement of your parent’s house right about now? I mean, it’s daylight, isn’t your pasty and doughy body simply burning from the exposure to natural light and air?

Other than my cousin spilling a cup of (staining) hibiscus tea of not one but TWO gifted blankets as well as the not-in-use bjorn and my diaper bag, the day was uneventful.

When we got to the hotel, I prepared myself for the worst. Piper had just slept through her 3rd night and this would be a test to see if she could do it anywhere. Well, I’m here to tell you- NO. I placed her in the cushy bed next to me, and well… she grumped and complained. She rolled onto her side. Rolled back onto her back. Rotated 180 degrees. Kicked me in the face. Slapped me with her open palm.

I should have known- Piper was waaay off her schedule. Usually she’s in bed, sleeping at 8:30pm. Instead, she was pitching a fit in Claim Jumpers and tossing her paci across the room (serious). I couldn’t even do her bed routine of bath, lotion, jammies, nurse- my cousin had left both her key and MY key in the room! As I left Claim Jumpers with my mom’s room key to try putting her down there, I managed to get an extra key for our room. Once inside, my cousin turned on the tv, all the lights and her computer, where she was watching some kind of anime thing. I attempted to bring Piper into the shower with me, which quickly ended with a full on wail of terror. Piper HATED the shower. Okaaaay.

I brought her in the room, shut off all the lights and turned the tv way down (btw, she was texting AND on the computer, did she really need tv?) and dressed Piper for her bedtime. As I mentioned before- she could not sleep. Eventually I gave up, sat up with her and nursed her. She quickly fell asleep in my arms so I grabbed the only pillow that wasn’t wedged behind me (the bed kept moving away from the wall, so my pillows began to sink into the chasm)  and propped my arm up with her sleeping in it. She mercifully allowed me a few more hours of sleep like that until she woke up- when I noticed why, I understood. A beam of sunlight was streaming directly into her face. No joke. It was like she was glowing. So, I moved us to the couch, where she slammed her head into my collar bone and I decided taking her for a walk so she can sleep was way more important than me sleeping. I fed her and dressed her and we left. As it wasn’t even 7:30 yet, I decided to avoid calling my mom, even though I knew she was an early riser. Funny enough, she called me, and was already down by the pool. Piper and I went to meet her, then the three of us took a nice walk in the neighborhood.

As per tradition, we went to breakfast- where Piper was a doll and a toddler pooped on the floor of the bathroom while I nursed the baby (yes, it’s true). We then spent a few more hours shopping, and came home. Piper slept on the ride home, of course.

We sure missed Daddy, though, so much that Piper seemingly forgot him! She cried when he held her, poor Daddy. I was so worried her sleep would be screwy for another few days, but she went down at her usual time and woke at 5am, so not too bad!

- Living in fear of a five month old infant. I’m afraid to make noise when she’s napping, sleeping for the night, just hanging on the couch… she scares the hell out of me. Yes, my five month old is the boss of me.

- Being more tired than you have ever been before, yet having to push past that to take care of the baby. As a person who previously slept all she could before, it makes a difference! You’ll be surprised by how well you can function with little to no sleep.

- Putting yourself last, and loving it. Everything I do for Piper comes before anything for myself. I think your body readies you for this when it’s sapping your reserves of calcium, iron and all that other good stuff. I think being a mother is having your priorities change, now you WANT to do something for someone else, your own needs will get met later.

- Doing what’s best, not what’s cheapest, easiest or fastest.

- Making your kids eat all the vegetables you hate because you kind of wish your parents had done that for you.

- Learning to let go of your competitiveness. There will always be another mom/baby who is doing something you/your baby can’t do. If you spend all your time trying to compete with the Momzis, you won’t get anywhere.

- Realizing you are still wearing pants with ripped elastic because you can’t make time to go to Target/Old Navy to get new ones.

- There is no such thing as a “quick trip” now. You have to make sure the baby is fed, your clothes are on right, her clothes are on right, you have your wallet, phone and keys, her diaper bag is stocked and load her in the car. That’s when she decides to poop.

- Wondering where that smell came from

- Wanting better for someone else, and knowing you’ll give it to them.

- Tearing up while you put away outgrown clothes

- Finding poop hilarious, especially when it’s covering your baby. I know, it’s not funny, right? I dare you to walk into your baby’s room (yours, no one else’s kid is cute covered in poop), see them covered head to toe in poop while also grinning at you, and NOT laugh. Seriously.

- Giving advice to newer mommies, because you hate to see them go through the same things you did and…

- realizing they probably won’t listen to you, as you didn’t listen to other mommies, either.

- Knowing there really aren’t “right” and “wrong” parenting styles.

- admitting you may have been a tad bit idealistic while pregnant

- Wanting to mend all bridges that had previously been burned, life is too short to hold grudges

- finding things your kid does are heartbreakingly cute, until you tell someone else and they blank stare you.

- Understanding there aren’t enough hours in the day to do everything, so you choose just one thing to do, then toss it aside to play with your child.

- saying, “She will NEVER be allowed to dress like that” when driving down the street

- Knowing who your true friends are

- finally getting a routine down, just in time for a new wakeful period, tooth, or milestone to keep the kid awake.

- Looking at your child, your husband, back to the child and thinking, “We made this. This is our family”.

- Laughing at mistakes, learning from errors, and loving the results anyway.

*Now, I know my baby is only 5 months old, and I am no expert qualified to give advice that may be of use, but take pity on a new mommy’s experience for a sec, okay?

Piper will be five months old on Saturday. FIVE MONTHS! While she still doesn’t sleep through the night all the time, and she’s still not rolling over ten times a day (she DOES roll over, though), there is ONE thing I’ll be sure to tell all preggos and new mommies I know.

BE YOUR OWN PERSON.

No, not like “get me-time”, although that IS good advice. No, I mean be an individual. Don’t get bogged down with what other mommies and books say. Sure, the books say your baby should be doing XX by XX month. When your baby doesn’t, you worry, right? I know I do.

Breastfeeding. Hardest thing ever. Especially considering it’s literally the body at work, doing what it’s supposed to do. Despite that, some people just don’t make milk. During pregnancy, we have so many hopes and dreams for our lives post-baby. I’ve mentioned this before.

The thing is… like with life, things don’t always go as planned with babies. Unfortunately, we get so hung up on things that we forget that our babies are brand new, and completely different from that person’s baby, or your cousin’s baby. I got so obsessed with making Piper sleep in her bassinet in those first few weeks that I forgot to enjoy that cuddle when I pulled our baby into bed with us as a last resort to make her sleep.  Time passes so quickly in that first few weeks that while it felt like it was a constant cycle of feed, change, sleep, it was really her life at that time speeding by in an easily forgettable instant.

Admit it, when the baby won’t nurse, the latch isn’t right, your milk isn’t coming in (any of those), you feel guilty. EVERYONE else can do it, why not me?! The same goes with sleeping habits, Piper wouldn’t sleep in her bassinet for six weeks. SIX WEEKS. I held her on my chest for SIX WEEKS. I rocked her, like I was told not to do- to avoid creating bad habits. Ladies, if there is one thing I can tell you: BE YOUR OWN PERSON and do what you need to do to feed/clothe/soothe your baby. Forget what everyone else does, as with pregnancy, all babies are different.

Sure, it’s wonderful to get advice from moms that have been there, trust me- I called my friend Tricia MANY times regarding things ranging from Piper’s belly button stump to being worried I didn’t feel a let-down feeling. It’s great to have friends/family who has been there. Just know that if things do not go as planned or as other people said they should- it’s just part of being a mom. Life is full of unexpected happenings, and as long as you roll with it, you won’t pull yourself down too much.

The early months are all about surviving, really. You do what needs to be done in order to get that baby to sleep, to eat, to stop crying. There were nights I’d stay awake all night, constantly trying something new. The gripe water wasn’t working, and XXXXX said it would! Constantly, I’d say, “What am I doing wrong?” I wish I had known- Piper is an individual and what works for others might not work for her. And honestly, 9 times out of 10, it wasn’t my fault that something wasn’t right, sometimes Piper just didn’t want to sleep.

So, mommies (and mommies to be), I beg of you: be an individual. Take bits and pieces from friends, family and books, but don’t get overly invested in them. Your baby will do what she/he wants to do, whether or not the books say it’s right.

One more thing: that mommy with a 5 year old who claims her kid slept through the night at 2 weeks? Yeah, she’s a liar. Or has a crappy memory. That’s how it works- the farther away the experience is in your memory the better the experience gets.

Have I mentioned Piper was talking at a month old? No?

I’m sensing a revolt in process.

For the past few weeks, Piper only naps well at home on the weekends. I don’t know why, it’s just as loud and bright as the office. At work she stays awake- but grumpy- all the time, until she gets in the car and we are off to home, THEN she’ll sleep. At night she’d wake up once.

Then, she started napping at work once we moved  her to her own room at home. Sure, she takes a little bit of rocking to get to sleep at work, but it happens. Then, she started waking up at night- 2am, 4am… Twice a night, different times each night. What on earth? Another change, now that she’s in her own room, and I hear her on the monitor, she’s started to actually cry for me to come in, instead of her usual “complaining”. This new habit is also not cute.

I don’t know what to do. Everyone has mentioned now is the time to sleep train, but it’s really not an issue when she only wakes up to eat and then goes back down after a bit of soothing. When she eats, she EATS, too- gulping and all, so I know she’s not just waking up to wake up. Of course, when she wakes an hour and a half after her last feed, and stays awake talking to herself, well… that’s something else all together. That’s when I leave her be and let her at it.

My previously good sleeper has turned into a baby who wants to do everything. Of course, she has now mastered the roll (both from back and tummy), and all that, so now she’s totally finding out all these new tricks. Sometimes I go to get her in the morning and she’s on her side or turned as far as she can go in her bassinet.

My baby is getting so big. While I know sleeping issues are common and frustrating I realize Piper will only be this small for a short amount of time. I’ve already noticed how much harder it is to hold her and feed her. So, despite being sleep deprived, I cherish every moment I can with her, just pulling her close and feeling her hand stroking mine. Sigh. I’ll take it, no matter which way she comes.

P.S. : Don’t forget Piper’s blog for a cute picture! Love, Piper

Well, Mommy was MISINFORMED, thus an unintentional liar. Does everyone here know I’m only five feet tall? Heads are nodding, I see.

Now, does everyone know that Piper was born at 18.5″? I see some nods. Okay, Piper was born a baby of small stature. She was inches shorter than other babies born with her weight.

We got our birth announcements out (have I posted them?) , I’ve updated her stats everywhere and then I started filling out her baby book (yes, she’s 4 months old). As I gathered our hospital bracelets, her umbilical cord stump (still debating on keeping that), the hospital bassinet insert that proclaimed her a breastfeeding girl and listed all her stats I noticed… it listed her at 18.25″ long??

She is a whole quarter of an inch LESS than I thought? LESS that I’ve been telling people? LESS than how short she already WAS? God, I’m a sham! I mentioned it (okay, yelled) to Paul who said, “Yeah, and they measured a few times.” You couldn’t TELL ME? So I wouldn’t be telling people the wrong length? I mean, I felt bad that she was short already, and now this is even shorter!

As I sat there, gaped mouth catching flies, I thought, “What the hell am I going to tell people? Her announcement is 18.5″! What, do I have to add an asterisk to everything with a small notation proclaiming her real birth length?”

When we were looking at my own (partially filled, thanks Mom) baby book, Paul and I noticed- I was the exact same length at birth. OH MAN. I’ve passed on my midgetness to Piper. Sadness. Then we checked out the different recorded doctor’s appointments and noticed: Piper is growing a lot faster than I did. She’s about the same weight I was when I was 9 months old, her length, too, is quickly catching up.

To make myself feel better, I am thinking Piper just didn’t have enough room to grow in my womb. Supposedly, the body won’t let you grow a baby who is too big for you to birth (unless your pubic bone is not the best size like mine), so I’m hoping she just grew to where she was supposed to be AFTER birth. After all, she grew 2.25″ in two weeks post birth, that’s a LOT. Two weeks later, for her monthly checkup, she was only a quarter of an inch taller. This makes me feel better, two and a half inches in a month, most of that the two weeks post birth (she was back to her birth weight less than a week after being born).

The good news is,  as of her four month appointment she had grown six and a half inches. Not bad, right?

Still, what do I do about everything that has her birth weight? Some day she’ll look at that bassinet insert card and say, “I thought you said I was 18.5″!” I know I would if I had seen that.

I guess I can try to slyly blame the hospital. “Yeah, they told us but they were wrong?” Or just say, “I’m the Mommy, and I know what’s right.” Sigh.

On Friday I decided to take a big step- I moved Piper into her own room. Lately she has had this habit of picking up and dropping her legs at night. ALL night. Sleeping, awake, no difference. Legs thumping constantly.

Finally, after laying awake all night listening to this I decided- she’s moving.

Friday night we had her usual bedtime routine- bath, lotion, jammies and nurse. This time instead of nursing her in our room and putting her down in her bassinet in there I wheeled her bassinet into her room, moved it to the rug, and nursed her in the glider. She was pretty tired so she knocked out pretty fast. That night was the first since November 22nd that Paul and I went into the bedroom for bed with the light on. Can you believe that?

Every night we’d play the game of “quietest person wins” and sneak into the bedroom, lights completely out and dead silent. Any little noise and I’d hiss in fear. It’s seriously a horrible way to live, in fear of waking the Boss, er, baby. In the middle of the night, when she’d fuss, I’d pick her up and take her into her room to nurse then a quick rock to put her back to sleep. In the beginning, I would go to bed at 8pm with her on my chest, watching tv until the latest show I could stand to watch was over (usually 1:30am started Married With Children) then I’d turn off the tv and attempt to sleep. I did that because I was afraid of getting jolted awake with a fussy baby. So stupid, because I missed more sleep than ever that way!

Anyway, that is how we’d been living, literally in the dark, stumbling along trying not to wake her. Finally, I’d had enough. Although studies show the SIDS risk drops at 6 months, I couldn’t wait any longer- she was keeping US awake now! And hey, four and a half months is a really long time, if you think that every.single.night. was playing the “don’t wake the baby” game.

Friday, it began. I put her in her room, turned the monitor on, and came out in the living room. Then, bored with what Paul had on tv, I turned on the bedroom light (eeeee! First time in months!), and moved to the bedroom to read some trashy magazines and watch The Nanny. Yes, I am a loser who loves The Nanny. At 11:45p I turned off the lights and tv and tried to sleep. Then I panicked and thought Piper wasn’t breathing. I turned up the monitor and held it to my ear- yep, it was there, a light sigh. Paul came to bed and tossed and turned for awhile, seemingly wanting to talk-something we haven’t done in bed for (yep, you guessed it) months. Eventually we both fell asleep.

At 3:30am I was awakened by the sound of babbling. Piper was talking in her bassinet! It was super cute. Instead of getting up to feed her as I usually would, I decided to lay there and listen to her for a bit. Since it was so cute, I started giggling. Paul woke up and we listened together, then I decided to go get her. I fed her and put her back to sleep, and she woke at 7am (then fed her again and she woke up at 10am).

It appears Piper sleeps a little better in her own room! While it may freak me the heck out, I like it, too. So far we’re on night 4 (tonight). I hope she sleeps tonight, she’s napping right now.

A little fact about me: I’m terrified of talking about P’s sleeping habits, thinking it’ll get jinxed. Pathetic? Yes.

I think I discussed my obstetrician on here before (after having had another one while mine was on maternity leave), but I never really went into details. Here goes.

My doctor was Sara Klevens in Santa Monica, a young doctor who happened to be pregnant and due the September before my November baby was due. Since our first meeting, she was kind and made us feel like she had all the time in the world to talk with us. Since I’m sure that’s how she was with all patients, I’m surprised we never had to wait more than 10 minutes to see her.

Dr. K was always willing to explain anything, more than helpful with concerns and since she was in the same boat (pregnant), she also was a little more sympathetic than other doctors I had seen.

As my pregnancy progressed, we began to count down to her maternity leave with a heavy heart. Since there were at least 6 other doctors in the practice, we knew we’d be covered one way or the other, but after six months with her, they got me pretty attached to her and her nurse.

She promised to be back before I had Piper, but- if she wasn’t back in the office, she’d still be delivering from home during her leave. How fabulous is that? I think there is nothing worse than putting your care into someone’s hands only to be passed onto someone else.

Now that she had left, Paul and I were given the choice to go to someone else. This someone else was horrible. I’d mentioned her before.

It’s funny how you don’t notice how much you like someone until that person is replaced.  Anyway, the new doc was cold, fast and sometimes painful. I longed for my old doc. Finally, as I got closer to my due date, I prayed for Piper to stay in there until Dr. Klevens was back. Being a good baby, she did.

Dr. Klevens was surprised to see me still there, albeit with my gigantic basketball belly, and we traded niceties and the usual, “I’m good, how are you?” Then we got down to business, I had two appointments with Dr. Klevens before Piper was born, and each one was assumed to be the last. When it came to the 39 week appointment Dr. K scheduled my induction for that following Monday- four days later. She then told us to get our labor started early, and that she was on-call that weekend.

As it turned out, Piper was not wanting to come out early OR on her due date. Induction it was. I didn’t see Dr. K until 8am the morning after my induction, due to the pitocin getting started the night before. She was kind, and slightly worried about my progression, so gave me time. Many times throughout the day she’d come to check on me, in between patients at the office. Eventually I stopped noticing the time, and just lived by dilation. I had to turn the tv off, as I knew People’s Court meant it was 5 o’clock and 19 hours  had passed. My doctor was never rushed, never told me to take anything to hurry the baby along. She wanted me to have the birth I wanted- normal vaginal.

As it was, it was not to be, and Piper was born via c-section. Because of the agony I was in when the pushing had failed, Dr. K went above and beyond and got me rushed into the operating room, which meant asking people to go beyond their shifts to take care of me. She knew it was a (probably stupid) big deal for me to have Piper before the 25th. Not that the date meant anything to me, but just that the idea of being induced on the 23rd, laboring for a full day THEN having a c-section and a baby born on the 25th was insane.

When the time came for Piper to be delivered, Dr. Klevens assured me I was doing the best for Piper, and that everything was going to be okay. As I was given my hair cover, and Paul was given some frankenstein scrubs time flew incredibly fast. I was in agony from the pressure, and I knew my life was changing. As they wheel in the Mama and set up the surgery and give her the anesthesia before they allow Daddy to come in, I was terrified. My first non-vision related surgery. It was all going so fast. I kissed Paul goodbye, begged him to be super close, and slid onto the gurney (as easily as I could with the wires and do-hickeys). Dr. Klevens was at my back, holding my hand.

See?

After the surgery she was so understanding and told us everything was great. We didn’t see her after a few check ins a week later. That’s when she saw Piper, and just adored her. The last time I saw her was at my (whoops) 8 week checkup. Again, she loved on Piper and told us we looked fantastic. Then, she said she’d see me in a year. Yes, I totally cried about that.

If you’re out there googling yourself, Dr. K, thank you for being a fantastic OB.