In March Paul and I are planning (note, I said “planning”) to take off for a night (we’ll be home around midnight) to go to his school’s annual Silent Auction. I love love love the Silent Auction. It was that time last year I felt sick on our way home from the Silent Auction, and told myself I would take a pregnancy test the next morning. It was also that time last year that I took advantage of Paul’s permission to bid on anything and bid on many items, many we won! I bid on a natural baby shampoo/wash set, I bid on a handmade baby blanket, as well as a gift certificate, a bottle of Coppola Sofia wine (the bottle was pink!). We won them all! Of course, Paul would go on to toss the gift certificate by accident later, but whatever. I have yet to drink the wine, but the bottle is so cute! Coppola named it after his daughter, fitting, right?

Anyway, I’m both excited and anxious about the night out. Excited because I haven’t been away from Piper yet, anxious because… I haven’t been away from Piper yet. Is that sad? Not only am I experiencing pre-separation anxiety, I’m also facing first-time-she-eats-from-a-bottle anxiety, and I-really-have-to-pump-and-save-it anxiety. The lovely ladies were fine with me bringing her to the fancy sit down dinner and auction, enough that they said there was even a back room I could feed her in! How kind is that? Nevertheless, Paul isn’t interested. He wants to drop Piper off at my SIL’s and take the night off. I understand his reasoning, but I’m still super paranoid.

I think it’s the mommy-thinking. What if my SIL doesn’t comfort her right (she has two kids of her own, so it’s not like she’s going to be flying blind)? What if they (My MIL wants to “stop by”) keep her awake playing with her and don’t put her down at her usual time? What if Piper needs me?

Ugh, I’m so annoyed I even think like this.