This weekend I watched two baby/birth related movies. One I’ve seen many, many times (it was our personal DVD) , and the other I saw for the first time Saturday night. It was early, but Paul wanted to turn in soon, so instead of my usual stay up late in the living room watching “What Not to Wear” and DVRed episodes of “Bridezillas” and “16 and Pregnant” (which I’ll blog about soon) Saturday routine I decided to take the laptop into the bedroom and watch a Netflix on demand movie in bed.
To start with, it’s incredibly hard to get comfortable when every way you move makes you UNcomfortable. In the end I just used my body pillow as a back/neck rest and propped the laptop on my belly with a hefty bunch of blankets as a buffer. I clicked onto Netflix and started watching, “The Business of Being Born”.
Before I start on my opinion, I think I’ll give you a little backstory on Me, and why I wanted what I wanted childbirth-wise.
Now, I’m the second child of not married hippies. I was born in 1979, my brother was born in 1976. Being “children of the earth”, my parents wanted a natural childbirth with their first, so they decided to have their firstborn in a birthing center with no medicine and no interventions. My mom went into labor and labored for 72 hours. They went to the birthing center early, and labored there. Then they were sent home to labor in comfort soon after, when it was clear she wasn’t ready for birth yet. As the days passed (yes, DAYS), she finally went into the center intent on giving birth. The labor was insanely painful- my brother was in distress and was rubbing against her spine. Finally, when my brother was born, the cord was wrapped around his neck twice, and he was blue. Meconium was in the water, which is usually a sign hospitals take as “WE MUST GET THAT BABY OUT NOW!”, and he wasn’t breathing. Eventually he came to, but would go on to be hospitalized days later after dying a few times (for a small amount of time). My parents didn’t know it at the time, but my brother should have been out days before-as it goes my brother has a permanent bald spot where his head rubbed against her spine. My birth, on the other end of the spectrum completely, was in a clean clinical hospital (without drugs, still) with a labor that lasted four hours. The birthing center my brother made his entrance into the world was closed, and is now a baby gym on a busy street in Southern California. I’ve been adamant that my child would be born in a sterile environment, with doctors nearby to help with my birth- and an epidural and c-section.
Before watching the “Business of Being Born” I wondered how much of it was propaganda and scare tactics. Of course, after watching it I wondered if I would be able to give birth naturally- not to the the extent of a water birth- but in a hospital with a vaginal birth sans epidural. Previously I assumed I would need a c-section because the babies on Paul’s side are notoriously large. Paul was nearly 11 pounds, his sister (who is now barely 100 pounds) was nine pounds and his brother the smallest- at ALMOST nine pounds. I have a pretty small pelvis, so was worried that I’d not be able to do it. The movie reinforced what I knew about c-sections, and the way they explained laboring in the hospital made sense.
Basically they explained it as this: you go into the hospital with your birth plan (let’s say it’s vaginal birth with no epidural), but they don’t let you labor as long as your body needs, so they break your waters and induce you. Pitocin is given to help you dilate, which brings with it more intense, painful contractions. With these contractions, you can’t take the pain (I believe the pitocin contractions are insanely more painful than normal contractions), and request an epidural. Meanwhile, the contractions are no longer hurting you, but with each one, the baby is getting squeezed and put under more duress, causing his heart to slow down with each contraction. The doctors become increasingly concerned with the well-being of the baby, and tell you they think a c-section is going to be necessary soon, unless you dilate to 10 centimeters before a certain time. It really does make sense, I think. Of course, it’s terrifying when you think of it.
So, as I watched I began to question my “choice” for a c-sec and epidural. I’ve decided that our birth plan is such: vaginal birth with no epidural unless my vasovagal syncope makes it difficult. Then I’d like to attempt a vaginal birth with an epidural. I’m not afraid of the blown out vagina, I just want the baby out in the quickest, safest way possible. My only fear at this point is the possibility of not being able to deliver vaginally (epidural or no) either due to a posterior birth or a problem with the baby, and I’ll end up with a c-sec anyway, which happened to quite a few of my friends. There is so much about birth that is out of our hands, it seems.
There wasn’t a life-changing lesson to be learned from the movie, as it really was one-sided, but it was a good documentary. Amazingly it did leave me believing that perhaps I COULD deliver vaginally after all.
The next movie was “Knocked Up”. I love this movie, and I have since I saw it in the theater. It has comedy, joy, sadness and strength, and the most shocking crowning scene (where is her pubic hair? Did she have a full wax before birth???) ever imagined in your wildest nightmares. I don’t know if there is anything to be learned from that movie, other than thanking God I conceived with my husband and not a one-night stand. Still, I can watch it constantly. All in all it was a movie that is fun to watch, and of course, quote from freely. After watching I got giddy, watching the ending with the baby (and baby pictures!) I think to myself, “We can do this.”
I guess I should watch all the movies I can before I have no more time left, eh?
June 23, 2009 at 12:25 am
“The Business of Being Born” really changed my perspective. Prior to seeing it, I couldn’t imagine experiencing the exquisite pain of my vag being ripped apart sans drugs. I thought perhaps I’d ask for an epidural a week in advance.
Now I have a midwife and am planning a natural birth. I’d like to think I’m up to the challenge! I’m sure you are too.
June 23, 2009 at 7:03 am
I’ve also decided to go with a midwife. The birthing center I’ll be at is attached to a hospital. The practice has an approach I agree with (no rushing things, open to laboring in positions other than on your back in a bed for hours on end, drugs if you want them/ fine if you don’t, etc) and I feel safer knowing that in an emergency there are doctors onsite and an OR in the adjoining building.
I watched a show on Discovery Health the other day entitled “Freebirthing” about women who opt to have children at home with no trained professionals- and many of the women also did without ANY prenatal care.
While I support home deliveries, natural birth, water birth, etc. I can’t get behind forgoing prenatal care or giving birth unassisted.
Several months ago a Freebirthing advocate’s baby died during an unassisted home birth in Australia. I just can’t imagine the guilt she must feel. If something should go wrong with my delivery, God forbid, I would at least want to know I did everything I could to ensure my child was safe.
http://www.theage.com.au/national/tragic-sequel-to-home-birth-20090411-a3hh.html
June 23, 2009 at 8:04 am
I watched this movie too. I’ve literally made it a requirement of marrying me that Ryan will support my desire for a natural birth and keep the drugs away from me. The more research I do on natural birth, the more I want one (5 years from now that is).
June 24, 2009 at 2:37 am
You might also enjoy Misconceptions by Naomi Wolf. It’s a fascinating story of her pregnancy, intertwined with stuff about the over-medicalisation of birth by the US healthcare system.
Natural birth is so much better for everyone, wherever possible. And picotin is a nasty drug that should only be used as an absolute last resort.
June 24, 2009 at 7:40 am
We are hoping for a natural vaginal delivery in the hospital and are working with a Doula to help support both of us in that goal. She recommended a great book, Ina may’s Guide to Childbirth. I read it and also highly recommend it. It is very anti-c-section/hospital…but if you look past that it is filled with many, MANY, uplifting stories of birth…which is helpful because so often all you gear are the bad stories.
July 12, 2009 at 7:46 pm
Yes, the movie is a little biased, but I think it’s partly because so much of U.S. medical care is overwhelmingly about the dr’s convenience and preying on women’s fears.
My perspective is – trust that your body will mostly likely know what to do. Childbirth is a natural event. I mean, billions of women around the world have been giving birth for eons, so it can’t be that hard. Yes, it may not be the most comfortable process around, but then, running a marathon isn’t my idea of a fun time, but tons of people do it and seem to enjoy doing so – and hey, the result of childbirth is way better than finishing a marathon. And at least there are options available in the rare instances that problems do occur.
The way I found my dr and birth center was to find someone with the same philosophy – who doesn’t think childbirth is an illness but a natural event and will support me in my choices – but if in the rare (we’re talking about 10%) case medical intervention is necessary, those will be available. But I do think there is an important difference b/w “sure we’ll support you” but in reality having a system that’s not set up for success and then “having” to intervene vs. really making an effort from the start to encourage natural birth.