Warning to all TTC and Expecting reading this, the following is not for the faint of heart, nor is it actually GOOD to read, I have heard terrible news about a woman in one of my ttc/pregnancy forums and it was just unbearable, but I needed to talk about it, at least to myself. So PLEASE, know the following is a heart-breaker, and shouldn’t be read if you’re feeling vulnerable or worried for your baby in utero.
Yesterday I was perusing all the forums I like to hang out in, the TTC forum and the Pregnant forum. The day was like any other, the gals were posting their belly pics (they have Belly Pic Friday for the preggos), when one woman came in and said she had sad news. This woman was due for a c-section April 27th, because of a major screw up years ago, when she was given RH positive blood in a blood transfusion. For more information, google RH positive blood and pregnancy. Anyway, she had noticed decreased movement and went to the doctor. They couldn’t locate the baby’s heartbeat, and she had an emergency c-section.
Sadly, oh so sadly, the baby didn’t make it. This news is devastating to me, how just a few hours can change your life forever. How easily something you love more than your own life could be taken away from you. I just don’t understand, really. Is life really this fleeting? I know things “happen for a reason”, if you have faith, but with that thought is the other, “The Lord Giveth and the Lord Taketh Away”. Is that supposed to be a warning, a threat? How is it possible for something this utterly shattering to happen, and to still think there is a God?
Over the course of 40 weeks, you’re planning, naming, painting, LOVING, and becoming attached to this person inside of you. Once you get past the 18th day past ovulation, you’re finally out of the chemical pregnancy zone, then it’s day by day until you get in to see your doc for that first ultrasound to date. Once you see that sac and everything looks good, it’s making it to the second trimester, getting past that 13th week. You’d assume you were home free, right? Just having to make it through the rest of your pregnancy without turning into one big stretch mark, and you’re golden. Then, you hear a story like this, and wonder, IS IT EVER SAFE??
I mean this honestly, WHY is everything so difficult? Why does my friend have to go through the agony of a c-section, 35 weeks of pregnancy, the work of setting up a nursery and the heartache of getting so attached, to only have to go home empty handed? HOW is that fair? I can’t comprehend it, I’m just so sad for her. I can’t even imagine her pain, her husband’s pain, her family’s pain. Sadly, nothing can help her. She’s going to have to go home and take down the glorious nursery she created, and possibly give up her hopes of bringing a baby to term, because if this loss was related to her RH Positive standings, she was told she wouldn’t be able to carry another child.
Sometimes life isn’t fair, and there are no words.
